Thursday, April 5, 2012

Cut Out the Middle Man

Having kids changes everything. EVERYTHING. For better and for worse.

One example: before we had kids, when we went to church, it usually went like this:
Ahhh. A day of rest!

Now it feels a little more like this:
And we only have two kids!!!

Church used to be about worship. Now it's all about SURVIVAL.
We're hoping God gives bonus points if you and your family simply live through sacrament meeting.

With this in mind, as we prepare for church we only have two goals now:

1. Make sure your kids don't disturb the other members of the congregation so much that they get up and leave in a huff and never come back.
This means bring snacks. LOTS of snacks.

2. Make sure you don't leave a complete mess behind.
NEVER forget the diapers and wipes.

Oh, also, if you can:

3. Try to learn something from the talk.
If nothing else, your scriptures will come in handy as a shield.

One recent Sunday, in our efforts to accomplish #1 and 2 above, we decided to give our son a snack during Sunday School.

The chair next to us was open, so we set a pile of Cheerios™ on the seat and let him at it.

Now, mind you, our son has shown a pretty impressive repertoire of motor skills and hand-eye coordination, so we figured he'd be perfectly capable of grasping a few pieces of said toasted oat cereal and delivering them successfully to his pie hole.

But he's a critical thinker, so he decided to skip an altogether unnecessary step:

So much for goal #2.


Paul Ovuoba said...

He's an efficient thinker that he is.

kwistin said...


i will keep this post bookmarked and refer back to it, when i have a husband and children. and also for when i eat cheerios.

what a frivolous thing hands are.

Jeff C said...

haha! Nice surprise animation in the post.

Just Mom said...

That's my boy!! Well, both the animator and the grandson. Cleverx2.

PIBBY said...

This is awesome! I like the animation at the bottom.

Scott C. Gwynn said...

I definitely relate to this. Love the animation too.

Mary Ludwig said...

Hahaha! I love this!
I think it's hilarious that you drew me crying in sacrament meeting. Oh. I'm just so spirchil! I'm pretty sure we laughed and giggled most of the time during church before we had kids. Good times. Good times.

Secondly- I LOVE the dreamgiver diaper. That makes me want to have you redecorate every single diaper we have with a sharpee!

Thirdly we only have FIVE MONTHS of having a toddler with us in class! Wahoo! I can't wait to giggle with you through class again. Don't worry though. I'll be sure to bring plenty of snacks for us too. (Cause let's not pretend that we bring those for the kids.)

Laura said...

I would come to Sacrament Meeting just to watch this.

And thanks to Mary's comment, I'm now imagining you coloring diapers during Sacrament meeting between grabbing escapees and rescuing your tie.

Heather Dixon said...

I could probably stare at the gif for HOURS

GhettoFab said...

i still eat like this...

G C said...


Izzy Mason said...

beautiful things to look forward to with my little boy. thank you.

gweenbrick said...

Oh yes, all too horribly familiar
great animation, by the way